Keeping up to speed with the latest stealth tax 9:15am Wednesday 14th January 2004 WHEN I read about the plan to add �5 to speeding fines in order to raise more money for victims of crime, in true Victor Meldrew style, I thought I don't believe it.

Rugby's just a flash in the pan 10:28am Tuesday 9th December 2003 I BET most of the people watching the England rugby team's London parade wouldn't have had a clue who the players were a couple of weeks ago.

We don't want this over-grown school sports day 10:05am Tuesday 9th December 2003 THE Royal Mail is giving �1 million to help London's bid for the 2012 Olympics - don't bother.

Trouble in store 4:34pm Friday 7th November 2003 SUPERMARKETS tend to attract the thickest members of society.

Smoking is not the norm 4:24pm Friday 7th November 2003 I AM an ex-smoker and as such you'll probably not take my comments too seriously.

More bin men not pen-pushers 8:50am Saturday 25th October 2003 SO sandal-wearing, down-with-the-kids-in-the-skateboard-park Waltham Forest Council leader Clyde Loakes thinks senior Town Hall staff should get paid more.

Supermarket super-idiots 8:24am Saturday 11th October 2003 THE NEWS that Morrisons wants to take over Safeways will be welcomed by stupid disability-benefit claiming, mobility scooter-riding half-wits across the country.

Blair spun us a line 8:23am Saturday 11th October 2003 AM I the only one who felt angry at seeing Tony Blair at a memorial for British service men killed in Iraq.

Not so much of the good life 6:46pm Tuesday 23rd September 2003 IF www.friendsreunited.co.uk is full of people who exgerate their happiness and success - I know someone whose life must be total pants.

Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner that I'm a rubbish neighbour 7:36am Tuesday 23rd September 2003 A NEW survey has shown that Londoners are the worst when it comes to being good neighbours - which is not a big surprise.

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